"In the meadow we can build a snowman,
Then pretend that he is Parson Brown
He’ll say: Are you married?
We’ll say: No man’
But you can do the job

When you’re in town.

Later on, we’ll conspire,
As we dream by the fire
To face unafraid,
The plans that we’ve made,
Walking in a winter wonderland.
Nicely played Parson Brown…and here I was thinking I was singing about the joys of Christmas…
The festive season — a time when we all seem humbled by a renewed sense of gratitude. We tend to reflect about the year’s highs and lows, the rollercoaster year we’ve just survived, and incidentally, our relationship status. The Christmas holidays stand out as that time of the year when being single matters most, or matters least, depending on whether you’re a "glass-half-empty’ or "glass-half-full’ type of person.
Being single during the holidays has its advantages: SAVING MONEY being one of them. Singletons are exempted from the laborious duty of finding their significant other the "ideal gift’, and can instead focus their time and money on spoiling themselves (after all, nobody else will). Think about how grades could shoot up for exams less than two months away. Alternatively, one could invest all his newfound time and energy in searching through Tinder like a kid looking for the toy in his cereal. Who knows, Mr Right may be a swipe away.
Start your New Year’s resolutions early. While all your couple friends are having tea at their in-laws you could hit the gym! You might be single, but at least you’ll be hot. After all, isn’t that what Christmas is all about? Christmas is an eventful month. This is your chance to mingle, and since you’ve been watching what you eat and hitting the gym regularly, you’ve never looked better. So what better a time than at staff party (or a random Tuesday night) to put on your party shoes and bust out those show-stopping moves? Create your own fun and live that single life you promised yourself you would. Who knows? I’ve heard that things always tend to happen when you least expect them.
Mistletoe? More like Mistle-NO. Walk away from the leathery-leaved parasitic plant; this not a Bridgette Jones’ Diary movie. You’ll probably have more luck sneaking a quick snog next to the bar or the toilets. (Pro-Tip: People here tend to be more vulnerable).
Lastly…New Year’s Eve. By far the most notorious night of the year. Year in, year out, we attend yet another promising event hoping the night will redeem itself, however the majority of the time we end up regretting we ever went out in the first place, and wishing we stayed home in our onesies.
For all single people out there, that New Year’s Eve kiss is by far the most over-rated concept ever conceived. Screw avoiding a year of loneliness. The way I see it is that you’ve saved yourself from kissing one random person who probably won’t even remember you the morning after. There are better options to entertain yourself. You could always third wheel and interrupt your friend’s snog. Just blame it on loneliness or the numerous Jack-Cokes scoring percentage points in your blood stream.
Wherever you find yourself this Christmas season just be thankful for another year!
HAPPY HOLIDAYS!
