Have you been in scenarios where you’re not exactly excluded but you just feel a bit off, a bit different for no apparent reason? Accepting that you’re the odd one out can be a tough pill to swallow. It’s that sense of not quite fitting in, as much as you possibly try, yet still being different in a way that sets you apart from everyone else. But the truth is changing your perspective of this difference can be an incredibly empowering experience.
When I was younger, I often felt that something wasn’t quite right. I generally always had a group of friends and places to go, but always ended up leaving unsatisfied. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it back then. I genuinely believed that I had some innate defect and had to get used to this uncomfortable feeling (even with the people I’d consider myself to be “comfortable” with). I felt like a living paradox, I was never able to find a group that was me, and I’ve tried a bunch. Not to say that there were anything wrong with the people themselves but it was a far more personal issue. I never felt that I was enough of anything to be in one group. I never had a niche that made this decision easy. Until this very day,
I’m constantly changing my tastes, attitudes and beliefs. The only difference is that now I see this trait as a blessing in disguise.
One of the biggest advantages of being the odd one out is that it allows you to tap into your strengths and talents in a way that’s true to who you are. It takes a lot of courage and self-reflection to let yourself be free. For me it started with wearing what I felt good in, calling out people when they said something that didn’t align with my values instead of silently agreeing. A lot of the times, people will find this encouraging. Others will be more willing to be themselves if they’re able to see someone else doing it so fearlessly. When you’re not worried about fitting in, you’re free to explore your interests and passions
without fear of judgment. Instead of thinking about what other people like, stop for a second and question – what do you like? Imagine you were being interviewed, would you know how to answer certain questions about yourself? When I first looked into what my interests were, I was shocked to realise how long it took me to articulate each response. I think this is a big reason as to why so many people don’t know what to do with their lives. Sure, there are many who really are unsure but so many are just clouded by the judgment of what others would think if they dared to do what they really wished (including myself). But the fulfilment you feel once you get to that level is seriously unmatched and I dare you to try it.
Of course, being different can be a double-edged sword even if you’ve come to terms with it. There will be times when you feel isolated or uncomfortable in a given situation. But it’s important to remember that everyone feels this way at some point in their lives, even if they’re the most likeable person we know. We all have something that sets us apart from the crowd, and that’s a good thing.
This process takes time and it’s never a completed journey. I encourage you to challenge yourself and consciously do your best to avoid falling into the trap of normalcy. Embrace your quirks even if the people around you don’t seem to find them as interesting. Talk about your passions even if people try to dim your excitement. At some point, you’ll find your tribe, those individuals who get you without any explanation. Those who will listen to you without having to ask. This day might seem far away but with 8 billion people, you shouldn’t lose hope. In the meantime, try learn from the people around you and be open to new ideas. Challenge your own perspectives by comparing them to the masses. If you’re still able to argue for your own view, then you can be sure that it’s how you really feel. And when it all gets too much, know when to give yourself a pat on the back.
Everyone likes to feel seen and validated and those 2 things don’t come easy when being yourself. Check up with yourself and your comfort level, you don’t need to go all out everyday so let yourself take a step back if you feel the need to.
Being the odd one out can be a challenge, but as cliche as it sounds it will one day be your biggest asset. Tap into your strengths and have the courage to do what feels right for you. You might just be surprised at how much you have to offer.
This article was written by an independent writer whose views are not associated with The Third Eye. The Third Eye strives to be the student’s voice, and that entails giving them a platform to voice their opinions.